Some teenage girls are arrested after crashing into a police car while attempting to leave a hectic party without getting arrested. They then find themselves in a prison along with a notorious rapist and murderer, two drunk men, some other female convicts and some escaped dinosaurs.
So Jurassic World is coming up, and I thought what better way to celebrate than to watch a cheap straight to video knock-off of the same genre (to be honest this is how I think everybody should celebrate new releases).
Most movies have a certain level of subtext, or a theme other than the obvious. Interstellar isn’t just about inter-dimensional space travel, it’s about a father daughter relationship, Jurassic Park isn’t just about Dinosaurs, it’s about man playing god and the power of life. Then there are films that have none of this. Jurassic City is one of the latter movies. It is just about some dinosaurs that have escaped.
It’s always difficult to engage with a film like this that is completely awful, but not quite shocking enough to slip into the “so bad it’s god category” for sure, there are a couple of choice bits of dialogue and atrocious cgi that cause giggles but there is no consistency. It feels more like Sharks in Venice rather than Sharknado. As a consequence Jurassic City tends to be a little on the boring side.
It has dreams of being an exploitation movie, there is a scene of greased women wrestling for no real reason and two of the dinosaurs’ first victims are bikini clad teens. It also has dreams of having interesting anti-heroes at its centre, however their way of doing this is by making one of the protagonists a rapist, which even by b-movie standards is a poor decision.
Overall, Jurassic City is entirely forgettable. Not anywhere near good enough to actually be good. And just not quite awful enough to be funny. A bit of a disappointment really.