The Oscars 2015

Ok so they happened. Let’s see how many of my predictions came true. In bold are said predictions, while the actual Oscars are in purple. Special Effects Captain America: The Winter Soldier Dawn of the Planet of the Apes Guardians of the Galaxy Interstellar X-Men: Days of Future Past Editing American Sniper Boyhood The Grand […]

Kingsman: The Secret Service

Taron Egerton is talented youth who is misusing his skills and doing nothing with his life. When he is bailed out of jail by Colin Firth he begins to train to become a Kingsman, before he has to stop Samuel L. Jackson’s plot to send the world mad. Ok, let’s start off with the good […]

Jupiter Ascending

Mila Kunis is a half-Russian toilet cleaner, who it turns out is actually a member of some intergalactic royal family. And because of this Douglas Booth hires Channing Tatum to go kill her, however in the process of this Channing falls in love with her, and also realises that if he saves her he can […]

Shaun the Sheep Movie

When a plan for Shaun and his sheep friends to take a day off from the boring routine of farm life goes horribly awry, they must undergo a venture into the big city to retrieve the lost farmer. First of all, I have always admired the effort needed to create a stop-motion film, and on […]

Texas Chainsaw 3D

In this sort of remake of the 1974 classic horror film The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, a young girl finds out that her grandmother has died and so must travel to Texas to sign some paper or something. When she and her friends get there they are set upon by a masked madman wielding a chainsaw. […]


Paddington is a young bear, separated from his family and sent to England by boat from his home in darkest Peru. When he arrives he is charitably taken in by the Brown family. Little do they know that Paddington (Ben Whishaw) is actually part of an extremely rare species of bear and is being hunted […]

The Interview

James Franco is the presenter of a rubbish celebrity news/interview program, produced by Seth Rogen. They find out through internet sources that the dictator of North Korea – Kim Jong Un – is a big fan of their show. They both see this as a big opportunity to boost their popularity and credibility. As you […]


After a global warming experiment goes horribly wrong leaving the world in ice, all the Earth’s survivors exist solely on one train, that travels around the planet once every year. On this train we find that a strictly regimented class system is in place. Snowpiercer is one of those rare gems of films that you […]

Taken 3

Liam Neeson is back as Bryan Mills – a man with a very particular set of skills – only this time, um nobody is taken. Liam Neeson is framed for murdering Famke Janssen his ex-wife, meanwhile there is this Russian stereotype killing some people because he’s evil like. Ok let’s start with the good, or […]

Ex Machina

A talented programmer (Domhall Gleeson) working for the largest internet search engine wins a lottery and thus gets to spend a weekend working on an incredible scientific breakthrough with his boss (Oscar Isaac). Said breakthrough is the creation of an AI. Centrally the plot of Ex Machina tracks Domhall Gleeson testing Alicia Vikander as Ava […]